Hello Friends,
For many, the holidays are a magical time, but for those with social anxiety, they can be more like a nightmare. Between parties, dinners, family gatherings, and never-ending small talk, those with social anxiety can feel overwhelmed by all the holidays entail. That being said, just because you have social anxiety doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy the holidays. Here is a practical guide to navigating the holidays and protecting your peace while dealing with social anxiety.
Prepare Ahead of Time: Making a plan is a great way to combat anticipatory anxiety before an event. Specific things you can do to prepare include setting expectations and planning conversation starters. Aim to set realistic, attainable expectations for yourself. You don’t need to attend every event, stay the whole time or talk to everyone. Set goals you are comfortable with and then match how you are doing. Talking with people you just met or don’t see often is intimidating. Preparing a few topics beforehand, such as asking about holiday traditions and pop culture, can help avoid awkward situations.
Have an Exit Strategy: Having a safety net of a way out can help make events less nerve-racking. It can also remove some of the pressure that comes with them. If you are going with someone, have a conversation stating that you may want to leave early and plan what that would look like. Or consider driving yourself or taking a ride-share service so you can leave whenever necessary. Also, prepare a polite excuse, such as “I have an early morning tomorrow”.
Take Breaks: Allow yourself to step away if you are feeling anxious. You can excuse yourself to the bathroom and take a few deep breaths. You could also offer to help in the kitchen or take out the trash to get a break from the crowd. step outside for a minute to get some fresh air and alone time. A quick step away can help you reset and come back energized and calmer.
Practice Grounding Exercises: If you are unable to remove yourself from the event but are feeling anxious, practice simple grounding exercises to help you return to a calmer state. You may also consider bringing a fidget object, such as a ring or bracelet, to focus on and keep your hands busy. I have a full post on coping mechanisms coming soon so make sure you subscribe and follow me on social media to get notified when I post it.
Be Kind and Patient with Yourself: Consider your needs and well-being when planning which holiday gatherings you will attend. It is crucial to set boundaries to protect your mental health. It is also essential to practice good self-care before and after the event. Get plenty of rest the night before, do something comforting to decompress afterward, and celebrate the small wins of showing up, having a conversation with someone new, taking a break when you need to, etc.
Your social anxiety doesn’t define you and it doesn’t mean your holidays are ruined because of it. You deserve to enjoy the holidays. It is okay if that means they look a little different than they may have in the past. It is important for you to prioritize your needs, your well-being and what feels good to you. Remember, you are not alone in how you feel; those who care about you will understand.
Until Tomorrow, My Friends!
P.S. I am proud of you 😉