Hello Friends,
One of the hardest parts of the holidays is spending them missing someone. Whether you are away from loved ones due to distance or one of your loved ones has passed, the holidays are difficult when a loved one is missing.
I have lost a fair amount of loved ones in my life, the hardest being my Nana. If you know me, you know how much my Nana meant to me. She loved Christmas so much and always made it so incredibly special. This post is my way of sharing how I navigate the holidays while missing loved ones. I would like to dedicate it specifically to my Nana.
Honour Them: My Nana used to make Christmas cookies every single year. She would spend days baking to ensure that there was a type of cookie that everyone would like. She was especially known for her chocolate bonbons (my dad’s favourite)! My mom and I still make these cookies every year as a way to honour my Nana.
Decorate in Their Honour: My Nana was known for her jewelry collection! She had a matching necklace, earrings, and bracelet to match every outfit she wore. She was the most fashionable person I have ever known. So when my Nana passed away, we donated most of her jewelry. However, I kept some specifically for a Christmas Memorial. I created a tree made of her jewelry to honour my Nana and how special she made Christmas (See the image below).
Keep Up Their Favourite Traditions: If they loved a specific holiday song, movie, or tradition, keep it going in their honour. My Nana’s favourite Christmas song was “Mary Did You Know,” and I bet you can guess what I am listening to as I write this. Specifically, the Pentatonix version that I introduced her to and that I would always play for her on Christmas day.
Talk About Them: A lot of the time, when someone is not present, it can become like the elephant in the room; don’t let it. Share your favourite memories of this person. Talk about what they loved about the holidays or what they would have thought of the weather. My family always talks about how much my Nana loved Christmas dinner. We laugh about how she would always share a little bit of everything on her plate with my dog even though she wasn’t supposed to.
Allow Yourself to Feel Your Feelings: It just struck midnight on Christmas Eve, and I am writing this blog post in my kitchen with tears streaming down my face. It is okay to be sad, it is okay to be angry, it is okay to feel confused, it is okay to be joyful, it is okay to be all of the above. Don’t feel guilty if you are still feeling the joy of the season, and don’t feel guilty if you aren’t. Allow your feelings to come and go, and allow yourself to feel them as they do.
It is okay if you are missing someone this holiday season. I hope that reading about what I am doing and about my Nana has helped you know you are not alone. Thank you for reading this very special blog post!
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Until Tomorrow, My Friends!
P.S. I’m proud of you 😉
